Rants, Thoughts...

With my husband back after 3 months, routine has fallen into place again.

I did tell everyone that he went and when he came back, but I never did get around to posting how the experience was - me staying alone for 3 months.

Honestly - I enjoyed myself! I did what I wanted, when I wanted it and how I wanted...(Not that my husbands restricts anything)

I did miss him - his presence was sorely missed - but, I wasn't lonely or sad or depressed... People ask me - "So, now you are happy is it? that your husband is back?"

I'm like - "huh?!"

I was happy in his absence too... but, I really don't know why people don't understand that.

Why is it that he is expected to "enjoy" himself and I am supposed to be all "sad" and"lonely" and "depressed"?

I did the usual things - I went for walks, shopped, met friends, went home to Mysore,watched TV, listened to music... *you get the drift right?*

One of my cousins asked me - "So, how is your life all alone? Are you bored?"

I felt like whacking him on the head with a pipe!I wasn't alone!!

I mean, my husband went out of town for 3 months - he didn't leave me!!and BORED?! I had no words to express...

Another friend I know thought I would be moping at home, but when I told her I was out shopping for books at Crosswords she was speechless!

WHY? What is wrong with me? Why do I know such weirdos? I seriously need to make different friends and pretend NOT to know these people!!!

I learnt a lot too - to handle things on my own, to make decisions alone quickly without consulting my husband (like - whether red bedspreads go well with our curtains...they don't by the way!)

If need arises, I don't mind him going again for another 3 months - though I prefer he goes for a longer term - like 2 yrs, so I can go with him and do something different with my life - other than coding inane stuff and sweating over deadlines!



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We talk a lot about respect and individuality. We stress the need and scream ourselves hoarse by insisting that women should be respected and equality is our birth right.

But, the more I look around, I see that it's the women who need to respect themselves first. Then, expect respect from others...

Unless you respect yourself first, don't expect someone else to do it for you. I think we need to value ourselves more.... What do you think?

We teach our kids respect, but unless the child sees the father and mother respect each other, how will he/she actually understand it?



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There's also the question of marriage - I saw a couple of posts about it on Sue's blog and though I didn't comment on it there - she sure made me think...

Marriage to me is faith and honesty... Be it love or arranged, we all start out with placing our trust with the other individual and then later on in stages, we build on it.

It also means making adjustments to each other's temperments... I'm the emotional kind and he isn't. I get angry easily and he is the sort who lets his anger simmer - I have learnt to recognise the signs - and I leave him alone until he comes out with what's bothering him... We have also learnt to keep t he communication lines open however difficult it gets and this has worked for us - we don't fight too much these days...

He doesn't tell me everything - certain things he feels I don't need to know - I respect that and I back off - I have learnt over the years to let go and not ask or insist he tell me everything and this I have realised will make sure he tells me most of the things...

This has worked for us... again, I am not pointing out fingers or making suggestions about marriage or trust factors here - We are still figuring out a lot of things...

But respecting each other's view points and trying to figure out why the other person feels so strongly about certain issues is helping us take our relationship to a another level... :-)


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I went shopping with a friend to Bangalore Central - she is getting married and her husband has insisted that she wears jeans and be comfortable in them - a tall order to a girl who has never worn jeans!

I seem to have the patience of a saint - if you don't mind me saying so! I made her feel and look comfortable in jeans in a matter of few hours!

But, she fusses! OMG! How she fussed! I was so close to losing it! But, each time I kept remembering that she has never done this kind of thing before!!

Well, I had fun spening someone else's money for a change!!! :-)