I want to write about a lot of things...
Including the fact that I actually don't harbour the feeling called "jealousy" in me...
I want to talk about how badly my cousin's wedding went for us... how we were excluded, spoken to rudely and ignored.
How my cousins and relatives have spread the rumour that we are jealous of them and that I could have had an abortion in the last couple of months!
Yes, people are saying that it's going to go horribly wrong for my dad and my sis, because he is "letting" her go to USA for her MBA.
All this negativity really pulls me down... yes, I know we shouldn't let such things matter too much.
Yes, it's like giving too much importance to unimportant people. But, still even thru all this good common sense thoughts, one feels let down by the amount of negativity one witnesses...
My cousin is going to Paris and Switzerland for her honeymoon because, apparently all her friends have been there and she is the only one left out!
Now, she was flaunting this in my face that she is going for 10 days on her honeymoon to "phoren" lands!
I remained unimpressed and impassive, well that's give rise to the whole"I am jealous of her" conversation...
It's not like we can't go or that we don't want to visit all those lovely places...
But, right now - our priorities are slightly different and let's face it , I want to visit all those lovely places because WE want to and not because someone else did it first or will be doing it soon!
*I have no clue why I'm justifying my actions here, Do you also think this post is immature?! As I'm reading what I've written, I feel that I'm complaining... but I need to get this off my chest, *
She didn't acknowledge our wishes or the gift I gave her!
The only gits that were acknowledged were the expensive ones given by her friends and another aunt of mine.
Now, this other aunt deserves a special mention here, she gifts the cousin of mine with Champagne glasses and when we are all looking at the gift, she turns to me and says -
"Do you know what they are?!!"
I was so shocked that someone would actually ask another person this question!
What are we - Neanderthals living in dark caves, who eat green leaves and beat our chests and say "oonga boonga?!!"
Also, we were invited to the dinner party at the very last moment, as an after thought. This party was arranged much in advance and my aunt had told my mom how "expensive" it's going to be! So, we were asked to the party only on Saturday evening after it was finalised at some club, because another aunt is a member there.
Now, my question here is, if you wanted to actually invite us, wouldn't you have done it irrespective of the place?
When the venue changed, wouldn't you have told us on the day the club was booked where the party was?
My cousion says - you guys need to come, or else the food will get wasted!!!
(Now, you tell me how one should react to this?!)
They all just hate the fact that we are content, happy and successful in our lives and we don't need to advertise the fact or shout from roof tops to say all this...I think more than anything else, its the contentment with which we lead our lives which hits them. (Major Anti-Jinx here! TOUCHWOOD)
I think it's they who are jealous and insecure! (Should I be even saying this?)
But, how can grown adults with education, loads of life experience, lots of travel actually behave like this?!!
*Feeling all better now!*
But, I will not stoop to their levels at any point of time in my life!
I will maintian the dignity that is expected of me in such instances and I will also learn harder to keep my temper in check. It pisses me off big time when people point false fingers at my family... I need to learn not to say anything at that moment. I managed it this time, but a couple of times, I failed my expectations.