Long-Overdue post...

I came across this article in Rediff, very long ago (I think it's almost more than a year old article)


The discussion board there is much more interesting than the actual article itself.
Lots of guys have written and agreed with one another that its because of the girl
– since she is making good money in the IT sector that the Divorce rates are
higher.
They also go on to point that a girl in the IT sector should be the last
choice for getting married…
What kind of bullshit are we spreading here???
And we call these people educated...

Why are these statistics so misleading? Or are these frightening statistics really true?

The guys in my project are of the same mentality.
Now, I don't exactly consider any of them as men, but their feeling is the same.

There is also some weird trend here, guys, who have spent all their life, save their working years, growing up in a restricted, small-minded environment have all married girls who are fresh out of college!
Now, we all know how mature, career-oriented we were at the tender age of 20, right?!

All of them are married to girls, who are not ambitious.
Is it because they have such huge inferiority complex that they need to control their wives, either thru physical abuse or thru financial dependency??

Many of my friends in my age group - single and successful women are quite afraid to go in for arranged marriages, simply because the guys elder to them, would expect them to either toe the line somewhere or make huge compromises in terms of
career growth and money.

Most of them prefer being single or in an affair where they wouldn't have to make life-altering compromises.

Why is it that men find it increasingly difficult to adjust to wives earning more money or being in a higher position than them?

We women in the IT sector lead are more stressed out.
Balancing both work and home is difficult.
We are ambitious, much more than our counter-parts, more productive and definitely much more professional than the men.
But, we manage because we have awesome spouses behind us, egging us on, cheering us to do better.

My friend asked me how I manage, now I necessarily don't think I'm managing anything because my support system is rock-solid.
(TOUCHWOOD)
The only thing my dad says till date is - "do your best and be the best"
My mom says, waiting a year more to have a baby is ok - nothing is wrong with that - concentrate on your work now.
My husband - he is the one who criticises me, makes me cry over my work and helps me when I get stuck somewhere.
He is the one who keeps a hot meal ready when I go home late, who wakes me up with a cup of chai and packs my breakfast for me.
Do I feel guilty that he does so much? NO.
Why? Because I do the very same for him... I make sure he has cleanly pressed clothes to wear, hot food and all the criticism and encouragement he can possibly digest!!!

What gets my goat is that a woman is expected to do all this and when the man does the same for his wife - he is either "Joru Ka Gulam" or the lady is very "lucky"!!

Isn't it but natural for the husband to be equally, if not more supportive of his wife's career, life?

The inequality gets to me and the level of insecurities never fails to amaze me!

How long will we struggle like this?
I hope that as we struggle, that some change will come about. But, then, I have always been an optimist!


P.S: This was written a very long time ago, but hadn't published it for various reasons unknown!
So, putting it up now after toning down the post... :)